Provision

Today sucked.

I sat down this morning for a productive workday finishing and producing the first DDQ Module that I spent the last month working on, only to discover that the company that created the eBook compiling software I was using has disappeared from the planet. Their website is down, they don't answer their phones. It's just weird.

So, instead I've spent the day searching for a new compiling solution. In the end the one I found is a little more complicated to use and a little more expensive, but a lot more flexible from a design perspective. I'm going to be able to create much better looking stuff, so in the long run God has worked this thing out somehow. Also, because this tool is a lot more flexible, I'm going to be able to use a lot of the graphical resources from the DDQ Manual that I couldn't use the first time, so I'm going to be saving a lot of time in the future.

I've spent most of today discouraged and kind of freaking out, but as of now I'm starting to see how this is actually going to be something I'm grateful for. I'm going to have to work like crazy for the next few days to catch up, but I can handle that.

I guess this goes with the territory of starting something new on your own. This is one of those moments where I'm highly aware of God's grace and provision, and kind of amazed that He seems to have been waiting here in this mini-crisis, ready with a solution and even with a blessing once I shifted my focus off of freaking out and onto Him.

Gee, it's kind of like a life lesson I should be learning or something. Go figure.

Bulgarian Music Idol

I'm taking a shot at posting video directly to my blog. If you already watched this video from a few posts ago...watch it again, cause it's hilarious.

From now on if I call you Ken Lee you have no excuse for not knowing what I'm talking about. You have been warned.

Dreams

I feel like my blog has been getting into a bit of a rut lately, so today I'm doing something different. The first thing that popped into my head was to write about pizza, but I couldn't think about anything particularly interesting to say. I think I might just be hungry...

So you have been spared my classic essay, On Pizza Metaphysics. Instead, I'm going to write about dreams. Not the "last night I built a go-cart racer with my ex-landlord and a giant gopher" kind of dreams, more the "here are some crazy things I've always thought it would be amazing to do or learn before I die" kind.

What? Don't tell me you never dream about giant gophers every now and then...

Anyway, in no particular order, here are some of them. I'm only going to write down the more "out there" ones. I may never do any of these, but I think its important that we nurture the meaningful whispers in our hearts, especially when they're unreasonable:

- I've always wanted to learn to work with and forge metal. I would love to have a small forge, to know how to combine different kinds of metals to get different properties, and make all kinds of useful and artistic stuff. Ideally, some day I want to design and forge my own sword.

- Study martial arts in a remote mountain temple.

- I've always wanted to learn to start a fire without matches. I think I understand the technique pretty well, I just need to spend some time practicing. You just never know when that would come in handy...

- Sing lead vocals and write songs for a really fantastically amazing jazz/funk fusion band. I'd also love to learn to play jazz piano, but that's actually more within reach if I get my lazy ass in gear.

- Join a swing dancing team that travels and competes around the world, and also just hangs out and hosts really cool dances for fun.

- Buy and renovate an old caste in Spain or Scotland or somewhere along those lines. I'd love to keep as much of the grounds and stonework intact as possible, and bring in a landscaper to create gardens and peaceful sitting areas around the ruins. I'd renovate the inside of the main keep into a really comfortable home with lots of hardwood and some big fireplaces (with central heating and modern fixtures though). Oh, but no stupid antenna or satellite dish sticking up off the roof like a bad hair day, that's just lame.

- Star in a blockbuster fantasy/sci-fi action film.

- Spend some time sailing, diving, and fishing in the Indian Ocean. Just not in the monsoon season...

- Learn at least 3 languages other than English.

- Participate in the archeological excavation of an ancient ruins that changed the way we understand human history. It would be ok with me if we discovered fabulous treasure vaults too.

- Visit the bottom of the Mariana Trench. I'm so curious about what might be down there.

So those are the things I'm thinking of at the moment. I'm trying to get into the habit about talking about some of the crazy dreams and desires that surface from time to time. A lot of these things have been dreams of mine since I was a kid. What are some of the things you used to dream about? If you want to dust them off again, I'd love to hear about them. Who knows, maybe someday we can actually cross some of them off our lists.

Ken Lee

I began this post as a simple link to a crazy awful video that Jackie Thain sent me, but Janelle and I have been poking around on Youtube and found so many others. Consider this your moment of Zen for the week:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqHyiOpaCro

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-7ZvzLaHPVU&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3uTGpDFywk&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95dJonNLu6U&feature=related

Where the heart is...

I'm sitting on the couch upstairs in our house at Three Hills. It's great to be back. Spending a quiet evening up here is one of the things I enjoy most. But strangely, it doesn't feel the same...

Usually when I've been out on the road for a while I'm always incredibly ready to be back again. I like having all my stuff on shelves, I like being able to scrounge for food whenever I want, and I like pulling my clothes out of a closet instead of a suitcase for a change. But is all of that what makes a place your home?

It just feels different somehow. Usually when I come home from a trip it feels right, like slipping on your favorite pair of sweatpants. This time it didn't feel like much of anything. Don't get me wrong, I was glad to be out of the car. It felt good to walk up the steps and drop my stuff in my room, and I knew where to go to get a cold drink, but it honestly didn't feel that different than any of the places I've stayed over the last two weeks.

As I'm writing this I'm thinking of the old cliche, "home is where the heart is". Over the last two weeks I feel like my heart ran on ahead of me, into the future. I can feel that sense of restlessness and excitement that signals that God is moving forward, that the season is changing and He has something over the horizon that He wants me to see.

I don't know what this next season is supposed to be about, but I'm looking forward to finding out. As long as my heart is in the future, that's where my home will be too.

Time to move

A Sad Cry For Help

I can't stand it anymore!

My blog looks like crap....

Don't try and make me feel better, I know its true. All of my friends have these cool looking, custom blogs. I'm not sure if there's some secret to setting up a really cool looking one, or if I'm just graphically challenged.

Either way, if any of you savvy bloggers out there want to give me a hand here, maybe point me in the right direction, that would be awesome.

Coming Home

I just got out of the car here in Charlottesville. It felt so good to stretch my legs and walk around the yard of Jonathan's house. The grass and the trees have crossed that spring threshold, shaking off their winter drowsiness and launching into full green. I still don't think I've ever seen a shade of green quite as fresh and joyful as the color of the young leaves in a Virginia spring.

I was walking around the yard and before I knew it I found myself heading into the woods. The sun was just beginning to set and about twenty yards past the edge of the forest this incredible golden sunlight was dripping from the bushes and the branches of the smaller trees. There really is something mystical about old forests. If you listen closely you can hear them breathing, feel their heartbeat pulse under your feet. I think the forest here was glad to see me.

It's really good to be home.

Time Out To Scoff

I caught some wireless at a coffee shop here in Ashville. Jonathan and I have been on the road since yesterday morning. I'll definitely write more about the trip, but I wanted to throw up the most hilariously bad sentence I've seen in a looooong time. It was on a sign hanging in the bathroom of the noodle place where we have lunch....these are the kinds of things I notice I guess.

And I quote:

"Each employee's hands must be washed thoroughly, using soap, warm water and sanitary towel or approved hand-drying device, before beginning to work and after each visit to the toilet."

Wow....

Death by tray it shall be!

I've decided that things have been too serious around here lately! And since I don't really have time to write a long post, here's a link to something that should make you laugh.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Sv5iEK-IEzw

p.s. the views and language expressed in this clip are the sole property of its authors, and I only take responsibility for the ones that make you laugh =).

Texas, part 2

Its been a crazy couple of days, but the Vanguard conference is over. I was surprised by how much I have missed being with friends, being in worship again, talking about real and painful and mysterious things at late hours.

Deepening connections with people here has been the best surprise of the trip. It isn't often that I meet people that I really think I could be friends with well into the future, but there are so many of them here. I've been struck by the clear image of seeing some of these people at my wedding some day, of getting together for vacations and watching our children become friends. I want to do whatever I can to make that happen.

It amazes me sometimes how quickly you can connect with other believers. I've only known some of the people here for a few days, but already I feel incredibly connected with them. I know I'd go really far out of my way for them if they needed it, and I think they would do the same for me. More than ever, I'm convinced that relationships are the heart of the Kingdom.

Thanks to all of you amazing people who have been sharing your homes and families with me.